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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Petishun To End Blond Hairassment

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We Can't Take No More! We blonds at the ofise are tierd of all the, the dum stoopid jokes about us. We think this is hairassment. It causes us graite stress and makes our roots turn dark. We have hierd a loyer and he is talking to the loyers at Clairol. We will take this all the way to the supreem cort if we have two. Juj Thomas knos all about hairassment and he will be on are side.

We of also talked to the govner to make a new law to stop this pursicushun. We want a law that makes peepol tell brewnet jokes as much as blond jokes and every so offen a red hed joke. If we don't get our way we will not date anybody that ain't blond and we will make up jokes about you and we will laff.

Sined by the blonds at the ofise: XOXOXOXO OXOXOXOX XOXOXOXO OXOXOXOX (sined with a pensul so you can erace it if you make a mistake)