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A Maineiac
Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.
Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.
Pumping Gas
Bill and Hillary are out driving in the country near Hillary's hometown. They are low on fuel, so Bill pulls into a gas station for a fill-up. The attendant comes out and begins to pump gas into the first couple's tank.
As he is doing this, he looks into the passenger window. "Hey, Hillary. We used to date in high school, do you remember me?" he asks. They chat for a few minutes, Bill pays and they leave.
As they drive, Bill is feeling very proud of himself and looks over at Hillary. "You used to date that guy? Just think what it would be like if you had married him," he says smugly.
Hillary looks at Bill, shrugs and replies, "Well I guess YOU'D be pumping gas and HE would be the President."
