You Know You're Attending the Wrong Law School If...

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Materials needed for Torts 101 include a baking sheet and apron.

Morley Safer and his camera crew are on campus more often than you are.

You last the entire eight weeks and Sally Struthers personally signs your diploma.

Professors always accept 5th Amendment as an excuse for not turning in homework.

Every question answered with, "You can't handle the truth!"

Two words: Dean Wapner

Three hours a day is spent chasing a little metal ambulance around a dog track.

In mock trials, the judge always sentences you to a spanking.

Your roommate is on a "John Gotti Scholarship."