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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

You Know Your Postal Carrier Is Working Too Hard When He...

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...Announces he just married a sheet of Marilyn Monroe stamps.

...It's been over three weeks since he cleaned his gun.

...Delivers the mail wearing nothing but bubble wrap.

...His new system: reach into the bag and whatever you can grab is yours!

...Just sits on the curb, tearing pages out of "Victoria's Secret" catalogue and eating them.

...He's been leaving most of the driving to his pet monkey, Lanaugh.

...Claims he's Elmo; demands that you tickle him.