Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Comebacks To "Why Aren't You Married Yet?"

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1. You haven't asked yet.

2. I was hoping to do something meaningful with my life.

3. Because I just love hearing this question.

4. Just lucky, I guess.

5. It gives my mother something to live for.

6. My fiancee is awaiting his/her parole.

7. I'm still hoping for a shot at Miss/Mr. America.

8. Do you know how hard it is to get two tickets to Miss Saigon?

9. I'm waiting until I get to be your age.

10. It didn't seem worth a blood test.

11. I already have enough laundry to do, thank you.

12. Because I think it would take all the spontaneity out of
dating.

13. My co-op board doesn't allow spouses.

14. I'd have to forfeit my billion dollar trust fund.

15. They just opened a great singles bar on my block.

16. I wouldn't want my parents to drop dead from sheer happiness.

17. I guess it just goes to prove that you can't trust those
voodoo doll rituals.

18. What? And lose all the money I've invested in running
personal ads?

19. I don't want to have to support another person on my
paycheck.

20. Why aren't you thin?

21. I'm married to my career, although recently we have been considering a trial separation.

22. (Bonus reply for Single Mothers) Because having a husband and a child would be redundant.