Maineiac

Family Safe Jokes

Find Us / Like Us

FacebookMySpaceTwitterDiggDeliciousStumbleuponGoogle BookmarksRedditNewsvineTechnoratiLinkedinRSS FeedPinterest
Pin It

Login Form

A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Nuts

Star InactiveStar InactiveStar InactiveStar InactiveStar Inactive
 

A doctor at an insane asylum, decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.

When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled, "Up nuts!" and the inmates complied by standing up. After the anthem he yelled, "Down Nuts!" and they all sat. After a home run he yelled, "Cheer nuts!" and they all broke into applause and cheers.

Thinking things were going very well, he decided to go get a beer and a hot-dog, leaving his assistant in charge.

When he returned there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, he asked what happened.

The assistant replied, "Well... everything was fine until some guy walked by and yelled, 'PEANUTS!' "