Maineiac

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A Maineiac

Mainer = A person who stays in Maine for an entire winter.

Maineiac = A person who doesn't have the sense to leave Maine after the 1st winter.

Anthrax Scare

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CHICAGO (AP) -- Chicago Bears football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head coach Dick Jauron immediately suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate.

After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players was the goal line.

Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.