Maineiac

On a recent tour of the United States, the Pope took a couple of days off his itinerary to visit the Florida coastline on an impromptu sightseeing trip.

His 4x4 Pope-mobile was driving along the beautiful shoreline when there was an enormous commotion heard just off the headland.

They rushed to see what it was and upon approaching the scene, the Pope noticed in the water a hapless man wearing a Chicago Cubs baseball jersey, struggling frantically to free himself from the jaws of a huge shark.

At that moment a speedboat containing three men wearing White Sox jerseys roared into view from around the point. Immediately, one of the men took aim and fired a harpoon into the shark's ribs, immobilizing it instantly. The other two reached out and pulled the Cubs fan from the water and then, using long clubs, beat the shark to death.

They bundled the bleeding, semiconscious man into the boat along with the dead shark and then prepared for a hasty retreat when they heard frantic shouting from the shore.

It was the Pope summoning them to the beach. After they reached the shore, the Pope praised them for the rescue and said, "I give you my blessing for your brave actions. I had heard that there was bitter hatred between the people of south and north sides of Chicago, but now I have seen with my own eyes this is not true. I can see that your society is a truly enlightened example of true harmony and could serve as a model on which others could follow."

He blessed them all and drove off in a cloud of dust. As he departed, the harpooner asked the others, "Who was that?"

"That," one answered, "that was the Holy Father, His Holiness the Pope, the head of the Roman Catholic Church and the spiritual leader of millions of faithful Christians around the world."

"Well," the harpooner replied, "He doesn't seem to know diddley about shark fishing. Is the bait holding up okay or do we need to get another one?"